A Tear From My Drunken Eye, (memyselfandi@4everalone.com)
A Tear From My Drunken Eye
(memyselfandi@4everalone.com)

Tonight I was googling
how to heal carpal tunnel                          (ow god damn
                                                                            fuck u tumblr)

and so I was reading this page             blah blah blah
                                                                (stretch this, stretch that)
                                                                                 ((rud dis n’ rub dat))
and then…
I noticed an ad
at the bottom that read:
                                        Recommended for you-
                       Why Long Distance Relationships Don’t Work                                                                                                                                         
                                                                                                
                                                                                               !!!!!!!!!!

              hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

recommended for you??
recommended for ME???
what…
fuck my life,
even my computer knows
I will be forever alone


I didn’t click on it,
but I’m sure if I did it would say something like…

                                              Congratulations!
                                            You Are Unlovable.

that’s right,
not even someone living
3,000 miles away
would want to take a lil sliver of your heart            ew…
                                                                                    (the horror!
                                                                                          the horror!)
then if I kept scrolling I bet
it would show me pictures of couples
and then it would ask…

     
What is the difference between these people and you?
   
    A. They are happy
    B. They are loved
    C. They don’t cry themselves to sleep every night
    D. All of the above     
<————-  ding ding ding we have a winner!

And then gifs of fireworks would go off
that looked like exploding hearts
and the song “somebody to love” would start blasting,
simultaneously breaking 
my speakers, 
my eardrums,
and my dreams…

I was only trying
to fix some pain in my hands
and in doing so it reminded me
of pain that’s a bit trickier to fix…             (ok, a lot trickier,
                                                                      really fuckin’ tricky indeed)
                                                                       
                                                                 someone please
                                                             rub some arnica on my heart
                                                                                   ???
the universe is sending me signs…
                                                  ((
start investing in
                                                        cats & ice cream & video games
                                                                      now… NOW!))

where do I sign up for
sgt. pepper’s lonely hearts club band?         help… I need somebody

all the lonely people,
where do they all come from?                     
all the lonely people,
where do they all belong?                (tumblr.
                                                               fuck u tumblr)
                                                                           
                                                                          ((I love u tumblr))
even my computer knows
I will be forever alone…
because these days/weeks/months                            
it’s the only thing keeping
me company

                                                                      (fuck u carpal tunnel)

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    Omfg if you only knew how hard i’m laughing XDDD … I’m a bad person. :c
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